Posted in poetry

Adrenaline Rush

I want that roller coaster feel

My emotions to be spilling out at the seams

To be on the edge of my seat

Like a terrible 80’s horror movie.

I don’t want to settle into a repetitive sequence

Taking on the same morbid role

As a piece of factory machinery

Which like an ever slowing pulse

Thuds, and thuds, and thuds eternally.

I want to be everything that youth stands for.

I want to be wild and loud

The regrets-but-at-least-they-happened

Not to be constantly second guessing my actions.

Wondering about work, putting off plans.

I want my fight or flight instincts to kick in

I want that adrenaline rush-

-And I’m going out there to get it.

 

-E

 

P.s. Just a little something to kick off the New Year πŸ˜‰

Posted in poetry

Poem: Buckfizz & Merriment

Christmas time, when all the children are grown up

And the parents are being spoilt for a change.

When you sleep through the stocking being placed in your room

Whereas years before you were up at the start of day.

When you walk downstairs

And smell the dinner cooking

The coffee brewing

And everyone in one room – for once.

And the dinner table, laid with white, gold and red.

The streams of alcohol, freely flowing

And your mother glowing with pride

At her perfectly crisp roasties.

The Christmas crackers, terrible jokes, bad trivia games

And much much more.

These are all a part of this time of year.

No matter how much older we all get-

We’ll always reunite here.

 

Posted in Feel Good Everyday

Feel Good Everyday: Dead Sea by the Lumineers

Okay so my first pick of the day would be the song Dead Sea by the Lumineers. I know just from the title you might not understand why this song speaks to me as much as it does but hang on in there and let me explain.

The message to me would be that the dead sea is full of salt, so the reason he see’s the name as a compliment and not an insult would be the fact that people float in the dead sea. Kind of like he’s her life support, the only thing keeping her above water.

And I love that simple message.

Like the Dead Sea
You told me I was like the Dead Sea
You’ll never sink when you are with me
Oh Lord, like the Dead Sea
Whoa, I’m like the Dead Sea
The finest words you ever said to me
Honey can’t you see,
I was born to be, be your Dead Sea

Another reason I love this song would be the fact that it feels as though the singer is basically telling you that it’s okay to run away and do whatever you want. The rhythm of the song is slow and soothing and one that often accompanies me on long walks on my own. It reminds me of summer time and also that despite all the stuff that I might be going for it reminds me of the important people that I have in my life.

You told me you were good at running away
Domestic life, it never suited you like a suitcase
You left with just the clothes on your back
You took the rest when you took the map

Again, I find the idea of running away exhilarating, having the courage to up sticks and leave has always appealed to me and in times when I have felt my very lowest reminded me that hey if things don’t work out I can always jump on a plane and go somewhere where they will. The future is a constant motivator.

Yes, there are times we live for somebody else
Your father died and you decided to live

This line is melancholy but also true, sometimes we stick around at the expense of others and I’m not saying that’s wrong just that sometimes we get so used to other peoples needs and aspirations that we forget about our own. I really aspire to go travel the world a year or two after I finish university and the idea of getting tied down by jobs and logistics terrifies me or what if my partner decides they don’t want to join me?

But the line “decided to live” reminds me that experiences are better than regrets.

Okay and this last quote is what I will leave you with;

I’ve been down, I’ve been defeated
You’re the message I was heeding
Would you stay,
Would you stay the night?

The idea of having that one other person in the world that needs you just as much as you need them hits scarily close to home in my case. So often I have felt the lowest of lows and all I have to do is either talk it out with Alex, Kathryn or Beth and I feel so much better. Laughs and giggles are what life lacks sometimes and appreciating and giving credit where credit is due is always good.

But to be more precise my friend Ciara is probably the biggest reason this last verse speaks to me. She came and picked me up off the kitchen floor and got me back to being myself.

Anyway here’s the video so you can have a listen for yourself and please let me know what you think of this new segment. I find that songs remind us of memories, ones that often get overcast with negative events and things.

Comment your suggested songs or even do something similar on your own blog!

-E

 

Posted in Feel Good Everyday

Feel Good Everyday Movement

Okay so this is quite an important post to me so please please please take the time to read this.

Like I said in my previous post life has been treating me kinda crappy and I have had enough of it!

Depression is not a fun thing to slip into and it feels like there are a hundred and one things to worry, be sad, get traumatised and mull over.happy

And I ask this, why must we only focus on the core bad things that happen in our lives?! Why do we have to be upset, why is appearing perfect online with a removed persona seen as cool or impressive?

So I want to start a new movement here on my blog- others can join in if you want but I propose that everyday you try to look for something that makes you smile and keep a tally. I also want to strive to put together a collection of posts following this one to show exactly what makes me happy!

I got this idea from a friend of mine called Kerry. She has a facebook page (which I shall link in a mo) which is all about loving yourself and being well.

She actually caught me on a bad day and I told her all the mumbo jumble that had been going on and she actually really helped me by sending me links to things and giving me the tip to keep a journal for when I really want to rant and doing a three step process to get things out, reflect and focus on the positives.

I originally thought that this blog would be my outlet but even I am not completely comfortable with telling the internet my entire story hehe. But yes, she listened, talked things through with me and instead of walking away feeling guilty for putting the burden of my problems on someone else/ the fear that it would somehow get back to someone I knew – instead I felt motivated to what she told me to do.

Okay here is the link:

https://www.facebook.com/kduffyarbonne/?fref=ts

Please, please take the time to watch her videos and listen to her message. Also, she really wants to hit 300 likes on her page before she reaches her 30th birthday and although she doesn’t know I’m doing this I would really love to surprise her!

yayAnyway, this was just the introduction to my new segment here on my blog inspired by Kerry and her brilliant message. I’m going to start every post for Feel Good Everyday with a song lyric that I’m currently loving and which has a positive message.

Comment below if you want to turn this into a tag and have a go too or even if you wish to suggest a song!

Sorry that this was long hehe πŸ˜€

-E

 

Posted in poetry

Shedding Skin

I used to think that shedding skin

Was such an evil twisted thing

Because that’s what they told me

So that’s what I thought.

The product they sold me

Was the product I bought.

Shedding skin leaves you vulnerable

Yes, this year having a tough shell is in.

Why be vulnerable

When you can be defensive?

Why would you willingly let everyone in?

But actually

Those with hard skin will often find

Old stubborn woes

That long should have been left behind.

New skin means rebirth

Starting anew

What is the point in letting old conflicts brew?

 

-E

Again all the news I seem to receive these days appears to be negative. I want to stop this in it’s tracks and stop feeling so frightened of my thoughts and feelings and instead rather embrace them. Look out for another post in the very near future because I want to start a movement inspired by my friend Kerry.

Stay tuned and stay happy!